Sunday....

So I missed another great day of church. I am getting so pissed that I have not been able to get there. The day started off pretty normal. I went to bed at 414am, stupid ass. I know things just are always racing through this head of mine and I can't shut it off. It is not always worries and anxiety, sometimes just mere daydreaming. I do that a lot, especially on those hard days I can't seem to get through. We were supposed to see about getting a good deal on our van today but that did not happen. Jason wanted to sleep in, which for him is really just sleeping the day away. Sometimes I really hate it cause we really don't see him that much and when he is here he is trying to catch up on sleep. I do understand that he wants some down time but it sucks that he misses out on so much. We seem to do so much with out him cause we don't wanna miss out. I mean things have gotten somewhat easier in that sense but still very hard too. If that makes any sense. lol!! We finally got our asses movin after a long battle with slowness. We were then off to a bday/picnic. My boy did real good today with his big boy undies...No accidents!!! Yeah Ethan!! I am so proud of him. oh the trials of potty training. Some kids do it with such ease and some are really difficult. I on the other hand just don't care about it, the peds said he would do it when he was ready. I guess he is feeling like becoming a big boy now.. Either way he is my big boy, that I really don't want to grow up. I kinda want them both to stay innocent and little. Without cares of this big world. But I know that they will get older and grow up. Wow, that was a side bar..lol! So we had fun with some old friends, talking, horseshoes, sprinklers and some football. To end the night with a screaming 2yr old that was soooo exhausted. Jason was in a bad mood from the drive home and our screaming son, so that put me in mood as well. Isn't it funny how that happens? So now I am retiring for the night early for me. No chatting, movies or books for me tonight. Thanks to all our women and men in the military who do what they do everyday!!!! Hopefully while everyone was partying it up today they remember the reason for this day!! God bless and goodnight....

Saturday....

Today was sorta a strange day. It started off pretty normal: we got up, breakfast, Jason left for work. The kids wanted to watch Bolt for like the hundredth time. We borrowed it from the neighbor. It started off as kinda a lazy day, not really feeling like doing much. I guess that is what I get for hanging out with Ivy on the porch til 2am.Fun times though..lol! Cleaned up from breakfast, put bolt on again, sat and watched a bit with the kids. Then I decided I needed to get moving, get something done around here. The mail arrived at the usual not so scheduled time. Everyday it scares the shit outta me cause we have a mail slot. Anyway, inside with the normal crap, we got a card. Huh? So I peaked inside and it was a 100$ gift card for Texas roadhouse. I was like what!!! It was addressed to Jason, he had mentioned a couple from a job he did wanted to give him a nice gift for his hard work so.....It was. I was mildly shocked that is a lot of money. Ethan was diaper free for a day. I am so proud of him. He had on his big boy undies and was so thrilled with himself. So then, I decided it was time for me to get online for a bit. I of course ventured to facebook, myspace, my email, banking etc....Then I decided to check out my few friends here in blogger thingy and who they follow. I happened to take notice of a blogger that was named Matt, Liz and Madeline. So I thought wonder if this is someone from around here or do I know them? So I started to read, the heading caught my attention."life and death all in a 27 hr period." So I take a look. I found myself instantly drawn to finding out this story. I was in tears, laughing, amazed etc... This story is so heart breaking, heart warming. What a powerful story. I was so taken by it, instantly I couldn't peel myself away from the screen reading and reading about his amazing strength and ability to go on. He had a beautiful life with Liz and he still has her with him and Madeline everyday just watching over them. They are lucky to have a guardian angel. She seemed like an amazing woman. I really can't say enough about this whole blog there is just too much to go off about. Just check it out.

It is weird how you can take someones situations and put your self in them and really feel what they are feeling to a degree. I mean really unless you have been there you can't but you can to a degree. I read all I could til my kids couldn't take it anymore but what I did read really made me think about how blessed I am to still be here. I mean Liz had a c-section. I had 2. How did I get so lucky? I mean life can be taken so fast and things change in an instant. I know that God has a plan for us all. We are all blessed we just need to take a look around us and then it becomes real that we are. My life is better then I think some days. Everyday is such a blessing to be here. i can't thank God enough for that special gift to wake up and share the memories with my family. I felt like as I was reading that blog I started to get to know him and Madeline. Which probably sounds ridiculous but it is true he really put it out there. I can't get them outta my head now. I will be praying for them, for their continued support from strangers and friends, for the safety and strength of the 2 of them, for Liz to be able to watch over them for always. Matt is a great daddy and their life seems to be great.

Sorry i completely went off there but I could not help but to express how I felt a little on that story. The night started to wind down. We decided to go use the gift card. We have been unable to go out to eat in a while cause of the current money situation. The kids had already had dinner by this time cause Jason never gets done before 8pm. So I packed them up and we went out to meet Daddy. We love texas roadhouse but tonight was not the best experience. The waitress was bitchy, it was busy, I was not in a really fab mood so all those together made for not so fun dining experience. We almost made it all night without an accident but missed the potty by like a minute. Why are kids kinda scared of toilets that are in stores or resturants?? idk! Came home put my little loves to bed, and decided to read more online. So that is where I am now. I am going to cut this now, no one will prob read it til the end so good night all. morning comes ever so fast these days...God bless!

Today is Friday!

Wow Friday! You would think that one would be so excited about it being Friday. I have no real interest in Fridays cause my Husbands work schedule sucks so much. I don't have a regular weekend like most people. Our weekend is Sunday and Monday. BUT!!!

Today was a good Friday so far. I have made a new friend. I always wanted to become friends with my neighbors when we bought a house. I mean really how fun is that?? Seriously, fun fun fun...We are the only ones with kids so it just so happens to work out. Well that and we like to sit out on the porch and chat til 3am..Lol!! Our neighbors are so nice, and I hope for many times where we can all chill and laugh.So far we really like all our neighbors which is good cause our last few neighbors really sucked.

So we had a play date today. It was really fun and funny. It is really funny to watch kids get together and interact. It was nice to just sit back and chat with a great friend. Watched Bolt with the kids it was cute. They get so into movies these days its great. Hopefully tomorrow will be a great day as well. I have to figure out something for dinner.........I have no clue what the heck I wanna make. We dont have much and one of the meals I could make Jason hates. I think just got sick of it because we used to eat it all the time its cheap thats why. Hey we all go through those times in life where cheap is the meal. Well for now, I must go prepare dinner for my monsters..

all these things to join..

why the heck is it when you join all these new pages it takes you forever to figure out how the hell to work them?? hopefully soon I will have it under my belt. lol! this one is really different and a bit confusing but soon I know it i will have it...

Going through some stuff....

Ever wonder why some days are so much easier then others?? I know that I sure do. I dread those really hard days that we all have to go through, but we generally seem to make it out on top. I have been having days like this a lot lately. We have really been going through some not so normal hardships for our life that is. Everyone has different hard times. I do feel bad talking about my hard times when I know that some others have way worse hard times then we do. But really it is life and no matter the degree of hard it is still hard. I am seriously in job hunting mode because things around this household are getting tighter and tighter. My wonderful husband has a child from a previous relationship ( he started young ) lol! Anyway, and due to new findings in the wonderful system of domestics we are now paying way more then we used to so it has really put a strain on our budget. Which yeah I know it is life and just another one of those glorious challenges, but it does suck! I really think that we are drowning here but I am trying to stay focused on the bigger picture and realize that God is good and He will provide for us. My heart is open to the plan that he has for us. We are being obedient to Him and hoping for better days to come. In this time though we have really been focusing on our family. I have recently shut out the world around me for the most part and really been trying to reposition my life in another direction. I have really been trying to make our house a home for us that we really love. When you don't have so many distractions in life you can really focus on the good and all that has been given to you. I have in the past few weeks been able to really start doing new things for myself and not trying to have other people or stupid stuff occupying me. I had a real habit of doing that it was like I depended on things and people to entertain me. I found that to be a real discouragement in my own life. I could not find it on my own but now I think that I am finally starting to find it. I have a love for so much in life I just needed to find it. It is like taking baby steps and healing.

In-laws aren't they wonderful???

So I know that some people can relate when I say that in-laws aren't always the nicest wedding gift. They can really be royal pains in the you know what. I thought that when I got married that I would have an extention to the family with these nice people like ya know you see on TV families. Well HAHAHAHA on me cause I think that I may have gotten some of the worst ones out there. And they are out there. They hate me...They think that I took their son away from them, and that I keep him locked in some cage not allowing him to see or speak to them. That is funny I know. I have seriously tried with these people but they are a tough crowd I'll tell ya. My brother in law played a dirty trick on us on Monday night. He called to talk to us....Well let me go back a little and paint this small picture of this weirdness..We have not talked to his parents in at least a year. lol! So ok back to the story now. Jason's brother calls to talk to us. He says "Hey how are you guys doing?" and then says hold on a sec., he passed his mom the phone. I was baffled that he would do such a thing to us. Wow!! For a moment I really wanted to scream some unkind things to her but kept it all in. She talked to me for a mear minute then said here is Danny (brother in law) So I said I can't believe that you did that!!! So I said you wanna talk to your brother? So then he had the nerve to do the same things to Jason, but Jason had it worse then me. His parents wanted to talk to him. They both chewed his ear off with the same (what seems to be BS) as per the norm. I can't understand parents who can have no interest in their kids lives or their grandkids for that matter and have nothing really to say about it. But what can you expect from people who are so down on life. They must hate themselves and their creator cause they seem to hate life and what it has dealt them. There is a reason God has muted them in our lives. They really know how to bring out the negativity in me that I hate so much. I feel bad that Jason has no real Mom and Dad relationship but who needs people in their lives that say the same things over and over again and don't really seem to care about you just that they are miserable. Well that is enough of that but I thought that was a little craziness I could share with you all that read this.

This is about me...

Well I wouldn't say that you have to be good at blogging to blog but you gotta have something to say and lol I have lots to say. I am a stay at home Momma looking for employment. I love being home with my kiddos but do need to get out at times. I love the fact that I get to see everything that goes in their lives. I never miss a thing. I have been able to experience everything from first smiles to first steps and it has been a great journey. As the top of this things reads this is a place for me to do lots, one thing is to especially waste some much needed time. lol!

So a little bit about me is: I am 27. A wife and mother of two wonderful amazing kids. My husband and I have been together for 7 years. We met during strange circumstances but have been on a great journey still to this day. I am so in love with him. He is a big pain sometimes but so am I. Neither one of us is anywhere near perfect but we love each other.We know how to get under each others skin. We have been through military, long distance, ex's, blessings, deaths,lose and etc.. We have come out on top and that is a good sign. I am Jason's biggest supporter besides his mini supporters. He is a wonderful man, father, daddy and Hubby.

We take pride in spoiling our two amazing kids. We still discipline but we do it with love and knowing that we are doing our best to mold them into God fearing kids. Kids that will grow up to be respectful, creative, loving, knowledgeable and faith filled people.

I guess that is enough. There will be more to come...That is blogs!

This is the opener....

Well this is the start of a new thing to join. I really don't know why I am doing this, but I feel like another place to vent isn't really a bad thing and maybe someone else will find it interesting...Not really but hahaha!! The thought of it was funny.