Going through some stuff....

Ever wonder why some days are so much easier then others?? I know that I sure do. I dread those really hard days that we all have to go through, but we generally seem to make it out on top. I have been having days like this a lot lately. We have really been going through some not so normal hardships for our life that is. Everyone has different hard times. I do feel bad talking about my hard times when I know that some others have way worse hard times then we do. But really it is life and no matter the degree of hard it is still hard. I am seriously in job hunting mode because things around this household are getting tighter and tighter. My wonderful husband has a child from a previous relationship ( he started young ) lol! Anyway, and due to new findings in the wonderful system of domestics we are now paying way more then we used to so it has really put a strain on our budget. Which yeah I know it is life and just another one of those glorious challenges, but it does suck! I really think that we are drowning here but I am trying to stay focused on the bigger picture and realize that God is good and He will provide for us. My heart is open to the plan that he has for us. We are being obedient to Him and hoping for better days to come. In this time though we have really been focusing on our family. I have recently shut out the world around me for the most part and really been trying to reposition my life in another direction. I have really been trying to make our house a home for us that we really love. When you don't have so many distractions in life you can really focus on the good and all that has been given to you. I have in the past few weeks been able to really start doing new things for myself and not trying to have other people or stupid stuff occupying me. I had a real habit of doing that it was like I depended on things and people to entertain me. I found that to be a real discouragement in my own life. I could not find it on my own but now I think that I am finally starting to find it. I have a love for so much in life I just needed to find it. It is like taking baby steps and healing.